the very salty producer of light

Ever heard of salt crystals? Or maybe its crystal salt. Or maybe there’s a longer name with the words ‘crystal’ and ‘salt’ included which I cease to care what is. We’ll just call it salt crystal. Or whatever.

Anyway

I won this salt crystal at a futsal tournament (yes, they gave salt crystals instead of medals. Neat huh?). It was actually a salt crystal lamp. A LAMP! Made of salt! Yikes! OK was being dramatic. The crystal is roughly the size of..hmmm..waitaminute, waitaminute. I can’t think of anything that’s the same size as the salt crystal lamp. Let’s just say it’s the size of a mini table lamp and shaped like a rock. I know there are all kinds of rocks in this world. Just imagine the regular ones. And it's real salt, see? I mean, it is salty. Don't ask me how I know. I just do. Because I'm the man, see? A friend told me a salt crystal lamp the size I have retails at a price of roughly RM70 a pop. So who needs medals anyway?

The manufacturer (or maybe the discoverer. Or pioneer. Or whatever) of the crystal claims, among others, that 'salt crystals can help in the production of negative ions' (or something like that, I can’t remember). In layman's terms, turning the lamp on will result in, among others; better air quality. This in turn helps reduce the risks of getting diseases concerning the lungs and such. Sounds like scam? Well I can’t really say for sure (I mean, it's free after all). Thing is, I’m mighty prone to catching a cold. And sometimes it’s so severe I’d start to think ‘apalaa dosa aku agaknya..?’ That severe. But since having the salt crystal lamp, I’ve ceased catching a cold. Seriously. The most I get is some sneezing, like twice or three times a go. Which is not bad, really, since I’m used to catching the kind of cold that is so severe, while sujud I'd feel like someone is wringing my head or something. Memerah otak. Literally.

OK here’s another interesting bit; the crystal needs to be turned on every once in a while, especially when the atmosphere surrounding it is a cool one, i.e at night. If not, it’ll start to ‘sweat’. That is, salt water will be apparent on it. (Am I pissing you off? Huh? Huh?).

OK here’s another interesting bit (I’ve got to stop doing that); for the last two days, for whatever reasons, I am unable to turn the lamp on. I think it’s broken or whatever. And I am unable to find a way to fix it. I mean, who fix salt crystal lamps anyway?

Last night, I caught a cold.

The world is full of strange things.